Are you letting other people control your life?

The majority of us hand control of our lives over to other people, by living our lives according to the views and opinions of our friends, family, neighbors, colleagues, co-workers, religious community and society at large.

Why?

If you only get one chance at living in this physical world, why would anyone limit their self to acting in accordance to what other people  think?

We learned it in childhood.  Fitting in feels better and causes less pain.  Kids only tease and picked on those who are different.  Feeling important and accepted was a nice experience.  This early learning carries on into adulthood and we continue to keep each other in check.  We are both the sheep and the sheepdog, keeping the herd together.

How many of your beliefs are truly your own?  How many people are doing whatever they want with their lives?

Sadly, most people live their lives based on what other peoples opinions rather than expressing their own.

FEAR

Fear is the driving force for many of our thoughts.   Does my hair look good enough?  Am I wearing the right cloths? I shouldn’t say how I feel because others many laugh or think I am stupid.  What I make a mistake?

Smart people often dumb themselves down to “fit in”.  Some spend money on name brand cloths that cost twice what identical no-name cloths cost, to “fit in”.  Many people do not do what they want to do because others would not approve.

Who’s life are you living anyway?

We are so desperate for the approval of others that we live unhappy unfulfilled lives because we are worried about what other people will think of us.  We don’t take a chance on leaving the herd.

When I began working at home in 1999 I had to leave the herd and go outside what everyone else thought.  My parents, co-workers at my current job, friends and family all thought it was a bad move.  I didn’t listen, because I wanted to make money without leaving my house more than I cared about what others would think of me.  I have never looked back.

MY SON is “NOT A NERD”

Maybe it is because I work online or maybe it is my love for computers…  either way, I have made sure that all my children have their own computer.  My oldest away at college has two computers now.  My wife and I each have a computer in the home office and my 11 year old son Logan  and 8 year old son Declan each have their own computers.

Logan’s computer was going very slow (as computers tend to do once you use them for awhile), so I was installing software on it to drastically improve the speed of his computer.  I use this same software on my own computer every couple months to keep it running blazing fast.  I really can’t stand a slow computer.  (You can check yours for free CLICK HERE)

So while I am in his room improving his computer Logan tells me that his friends all thought it was “nerdy” to have a computer in so many rooms.  Of all my children Logan worries the most about what other kids think.

I tried to tell him that perhaps other kids are jealous that they don’t get a computer in their bedroom.  He assured me that was not the case.  He gave me a whole list of his friends who thought it was “nerdy”.

Logan uses that computer every day.  He does a lot of things with it even at age eleven.  He has made videos, uses facebook, sends emails, reads websites, does his homework, has his own blog, and even has begun writing a kids book.

BUT…   Logan doesn’t want to be seen as nerdy.  His friends come over and see his computer and they think it is nerdy.

He made such a big deal out of it this day, that I decided to solve his problem and teach him a lesson in the process.

I took away his computer.

“Now,” I said “You are no longer nerdy.”

I asked his little brother Declan if he cared what others thought of him having a computer in his room.  Declan does not care what others think, he likes having a computer.

So now Logan has to ask his little brother if he can use his computer, because he really enjoys using a computer, but he allowed himself to be tricked into caring more about what others thought.

Ask Logan today and he’ll tell you that doing what he loves is more important than what others think.  I hope it is a lesson that sticks with him.

How many people die never living the life they wanted because instead they worried about what others would think?